UNCLE REMUS
Perceiving that Uncle Remus was eying
him rather closely, the negro straightened him
self up and gave a military salute.
Ignoring the salutation, Uncle Remus in
quired, "What mought yo' name be?" His
tone was bland and insinuating.
"My name, suh, is William Henry Haddem,
de word 'round."
"William Henry Haddem?" said Uncle
Remus, rubbing his head, and eying the negro
curiously.
"Yes suh, de worl 'roun'."
"I 'm mighty glad ter hear dat," said Uncle
Remus, with the affectation of enthusiasm;
"'kaze some er deze here highfalutin' niggers
is name William Henry on one side er town
en John Jeems on t'er side. Yasser!, right in
dish yer town, let 'lone de 'roun' word'."
"Well, suh," said William Henry, "wher
ever you go you'll find dat I am name Wil
liam Henry Haddem. Could you be so kind,
suh, ez to tell me where de gran' jury is
settin' at?"
"What you gwine do wid de gran' jury?"
inquired Uncle Remus, with some show of
solicitude.
"Dey want me," said William Henry. "Dey
done summons me ter come before um."
"What dey want wid you?" Uncle Remus
asked.
"Witness," said the other, drawing himself
up. "I bin robbed right in de public street;
dey jumped on me and took my money fum
me right before my own eyes, and I 'm gwine
up and tell de gran' jury all about it."
"When dey tuck en rob you," said Uncle
Remus, " how much did dey git?"
"Sev'mty-five dollars," said William Henry.
"Wuz de money all yone?" asked Uncle
Remus, showing no surprise.
"All exeeptin' of sev'mty dollars," replied
William Henry.
"Ah-yi!" exclaimed Uncle Remus. "En
who is de sev'mty dollars belong ter?"
"It belong to de Jacob's Ladder Serciety,"
said William Henry.
"Dar now!" cried Uncle Remus.
"Yes, suh," said William Henry. "If it
had been my money, I would n't worry about
it, but I 'm de treasurer ov de Jacob's Ladder
Serciety, and I feels in juty bound to make a
riffle and try ter git de money back."
"Des so!" said the old man.
"Yes, suh," William Henry went on, grow
ing more confidential. "I wuz walkin' along
with my hands in my pockets, when two men
jumped on me and got me down, and when I
got up frum dar I wuz perfectly nickleless.
Yes, suh ! perfectly nickleless."
"Den what de Jacob Lathers say?" in
quired Uncle Remus.
"Dey ain't held no meetin' sence," said
William Henry. "Ef de gran' jury will do
dere juty, I'll git de money back befo' de
serciety meets."
"What you say yo' name mought be?"
said Uncle Remus, shifting the weight of his
body from one leg to the other.
"William Henry Haddem."
"Tooby sho'," said the old man, "Haddem
had um, an now he ain't got um. Is you bin
foolin' 'roun' deze here gran' juries en cote
houses much?"
"No, suh," said William Henry.
"So fur, so good," said Uncle Remus.
"You see deze here steps, and dat dar door
dar? Well, dey leads right straight to de
chain-gang. I bin see niggers go in dar
lookin' mighty nigh ez big en ez slick ez what
you is, en when dey come out, fley mos' in
giner'ly got somebody wid um fer to p'int out
de way ter de rock-pile. Dem white folks
waitin' fer you right now. Ef you go in dar,
yon ruffle up dat hat so she won't shine, and
hide dat ar watch-chain whar dey can't see it,
en den when you git in dar you up en tell um
dat you done fergit 'bout de circumstance er
bein' robbed, en dat vou speck you los' dat
money som'ers in de big road. En den when
you come out'n dar, ef you come out widout
any han'cuffs on you, you des take yo' foot
in yo' han' en go swap de watch-chain fer one
er dem ar long railroad tickets what look like
it got j'ints in it. you hear me talkin'!"
William Henry Haddem gazed at Uncle
Remus in astonishment. He looked at his
watch-chain, examined his hat, and seemed to
be somewhat uneasy.
"What de Jacob's Ladder Serciety gwine
ter do?" he asked.
"Gi' um back der money!" exclaimed Un
cle Remus; "gi' um back der money! Don't
you dast ter go in dar en tell dem ar white
folks de tale you bin tellin' me!"
With that the old man went on his way.
He looked back as he was turning a corner
some distance away, and saw William Henry
Haddem still standing where he had left him.