This chapter followed Chapter 2 originally, but was excised in 1819:

Chapter 3

Duncan M’Dougal, taking the Captain aside, as he was walking home, suggested an alteration of the title of O’Regan’s paper, which was to call it the “Rams Horn;” for said he, the rams horn is a Scripture name; it was at the sound of rams horns that the walls of [Jerico] fell down; now if by a rams horn paper, we can knock down, this Porcupine, it will bear an analogy. The ram and the he-goat are spoken of in the Prophesy of Daniel. In short, the ram is a very common symbol. Hence amongst the Romans the warlike engine which they made use of at sieges, was called a battering ram. All this could be explained, and made a good introduction or opening to the paper; and this being don, it will be necessary that the analogy be kept up; for the editor must butt and run his head at every body. The hardest fend off in that case. It will behoove him to be a good deal personal, to be a match for Porcupine. The greater the blackguard, the better the editor now a days. It was not so in Britain, even in Wilkes’s time. National peculiarities were a common theme of his irony, but he did not descend to personalities; but you Americans have improved upon the matter, if it may be called an improvement.

The Captain was a little hurt at this. But, said he, is this stile of controversy of American origin, or confined altogether to American editors; I mean such authors of newspapers, as have had their education in America. Your armies during the revolutionary war, have left among us both language and men, and some have come since, from the other side the water, that if not the first, have at least excelled most in this way of writing. But it may be of more use to learn how to counteract it, than to ascertain its origin. It may be of domestic origin. It may be imported; or both. The truth is, that where a leading editor, becomes so, from his situation in a great city, or by his eminent talents, distinguishes himself in any way, the editors in smaller country towns imitate, and one black sheep, gives the rot to the whole herd.

But it will be necessary, said M’Dougal, that your editor, O’Regan, proceed in this way of newspaper blackguardism as a match for Porcupine, or a burlesque on him, for this is the end of his creation, and our object in taking him up. It will behoove him to stick at nothing. He must out Herod Herod in all that is scurrilous. Nature would seem to have fitted him for it, and art has done her part, from the servile habits of his occupation. He must have collected much dialogue, and I may add dialect, from the subordinate company of his station, in the capacity of waiter to your Captainship in the course of your late rambles. It is an ill wind that blows no good, and this village may profit from it.